When I gave my therapist an estimate of how long my last bout of depression lasted, I guessed about 6 months.
Out of the blue today I got curious as to how long it actually was so I went archive diving.
This post was made right before depression really hit: Horse Sh*t and I Fight the Blues
And here's when it went away: Rain, Rain, Stay All Day!
They're posted a year and 13 days apart.
I'm not sure how I should feel about this. Proud that I lived through it? Ashamed that I didn't seek help? Fearful because even my closest friend didn't know just how bad I was and for how long, indicating that I really am terrible at verbally/facially/physically expressing emotion?
What I do know is that those were really tough times and I should have talked to someone and gotten help, but I was way too scared to open up.
I'm not sure how many people will actually read this, but it can't hurt to add some helpful links.
- Toll free suicide hotline- National suicide prevention lifeline
- Free online chat-based support for anyone suicidal or going through a crisis (for people like me who don't like talking)- IMAlive online crisis network
Please please please get help if you're going through something. The calls and chats are anonymous. Just delete 'em from your history if you don't want anyone to know. Don't let pride, fear, or concern for other people's peace of mind get in the way of your own mental/emotional well-being.
