Jurrasic Garden

I was  navigating the harsh vegetablish terrain of my garden, collecting grasses for my tortoise to eat this morning. (He's a Sulcata. He loves weeds. He's so awesome. =D) As I twisted my way through the dense undergrowth of a large tomato patch, trying to ignore the sickly sweet sent of nightshade infiltrating my nasal passages, (yes, tomatoes are a type of nightshade. Just don't eat the leaves. =P) my eyes feel upon something shiny. The bird part immediately wanted to know what it was, and if it was edible. The squirrel part froze, hoping to not be caught, and the wolf wanted to kill it. My human quickly side broke up their warring and stepped in for a closer look. Upon inspection, I found that it was a pair of clip on sun shades. The kind that flip up and down.

The geek kicked in, and I realized my immediate danger. These sunshades could only belong to one kind of person. A snooty field scientist..... The kind you'd kill off in a movie. The kind of character that you don't care about enough to be very upset over, but the kind just tough enough to impart a sense of shock at his death. The kind of character who's soul purpose in the movie is to demonstrate what the others are up against in the manner of a bloody bloody death.
I knew this, and I immediately felt the need to make myself scarce. We'd done it. the threat was real. And now the human race would pay the price. We'd really done it this time. We had cloned....... Dinosaurs. Yes, that's right. The government had successfully cloned dinosaurs, the dinosaurs escaped, and were lurking in back yard. My garden was........ A Jurassic park.

I frantically cast my eyes around, hoping to not find fresh meat. I saw none. I knew not of how long ago he was slaughtered. I could only guess. It seemed pretty old, as the vines were almost covering the glasses, but then, maybe they went flying when the cold blooded monsters ripped the poor guy in half. Either way, I neither saw nor smelt flesh. That meant that while I would not run into any scavengers in search of leftovers, I would also be in danger of becoming breakfast to some crazy ass son of a petri dish.
I decided that my best chance was to sneak away as swiftly and quietly as I could. I snatched up the shades and put my sneaky-run plan into motion.

I traveled back into my house without further mishap and set the glasses on the table. I explained our garden's contingency to my Dad. He seemed pretty understanding. At least he didn't immediately suggest my use of a straitjacket. I also explained that I didn't find any gore, and that I was a bit let down. I was hoping to at least find some toes.

So, long story short, there are dinosaurs in my garden. Or, as I'm gonna call them, crazy-ass-sons-of-a-petri-dish. Or maybe petri-bastards? That would also work. Whatever the marital status of the parents of these crazy ass petri spawn, I'm gonna be stocking up on heavy artillery.
Hasta la vista, petri baby.

Explaining the Ancient Greeks

These are a series of emails sent between my friend and I. I thought that they were funny, and I really need to get into the habit of blogging more often.

Now, before you read on, I wish to make it clear that I hold no contempt for the Greeks.  .......You have got to admit though....... The ancient Greeks were into some pretty weird stuff. =P

Me: ......dude. reading the odyssey. the greeks were so perverted..... XDD

Silver: xDD They were?? Like.. What did they do... O_O

Me: You don't want to know. XDD

Silver: XDD WHAT THE HECK!? xD so.. perverts are descended from the Greeks?? AH GREEEAAATTT XDDD THEY HAVE ANCESTORS.

Me: xD could be......
My grandpa went to greece. he came back with some REALLY weird stories..... XDD
but seriously. Read ANY greek story, and it will have bloody tourture AND insanely dirty stuff....... mostly involving goats. =P

Silver: xD your reading dirty books.. AHAHAHAHA RAHELS READING DIRTY BOOKS RAHELS READING DIRTY BOOKS!!!!!!!!!!! XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Me: XDDD ahahahahahahhahahahahaaah.....

Yes. But I have to. It's what I must do for history! Oh history! Only to thee will I lose my precious innocence, for thou art quite a comely subject, being written by one of the biggest loons of all time, the supreme filibusterer of all written works (second only to moby dick), Homer! Athena doth looketh upon thee with utmost favor!
And so, I shall read this foul writing, this sludge from the depths of Echidna's soul For I, in my sick little mind, shall absorb this knowledge of obscenities past in the manner that a suckling babe doth work away at her mother's tit.

*long silence*

Silver: Lol...

*changes subject*

Politics

A funny story! =D

We were getting ready to go to local pub for 'Really Cheap Wednesday.' (......yeeeah. That's my Dad. XD)

________, my Dad's friend was sitting on the couch, Dad was tying his boots across the room. I was playing with an apple, (ie. tossing it in the air and catching it. .......Yes, like a cat. D|| )

"You're going to wear your cloak to the pub?" ________ asked in a bemused voice.

I looked up in suprise. "Yup!" I said, as if it was perfectly obvious. ________ nodded slowly. "Hey," I said mildly "at least I'm not going to bring my wand!"

I turned to Dad's snort of amusement. "What? I do have one. I brought it in my backpack." I said with a self-satisfied smile.

Dad fiddled with his boot laces before looking up. ".....You don't really believe in that stuff, do you?"

I continued tossing the apple in to the air. "....Hmm. Maybe. Why not? I mean, people believe in politics... What the hell's up with that?"

I think that this was a good step for me in my relationship with my Dad. He may think that I've crossed into a whole new weird, (which I have) but he knows that I still have the same views on life. He thought that it was pure gold. =^^=

DUUUDE!! eeepic blog!! =D

Okay. Dude. I. Found. A downright epic blog. One of the posts moved me to draw something! Here tiz! =D

........Yes. Weird. I know. BUT!!! It. will. make sense. IF! You check out his blog. =D
http://singleedgestudios.blogspot.com/2009/09/situation.html


PS! Jason, I wish to apologize in advance for using you're image. (........even though I have no clue of what you look like, save for your profile pic. ><) No offense is meant. If offence is taken, I just want you to know that
1. I just really like your blog and your graphic novel.
2. This will give you extra publicity (assuming, of course, that people actually LOOK at this thing.....)
3. If you try to unleash a horde of T-Rexes upon me, (by use of time travel) I am trained in the art of Necromancy, AND I am armed to the teeth.
Oh, yeah. AND I'm in the process of creating a life size, titanium, robotic maker worm. =D

I created an Astrological chart! =^^=

 You can use it to trace compatibilities. For example: Leo, Aries, and Sagittarius are in a triangle. This means that they are highly compatible, but there are more lines out side of that. From looking at this chart, we can see that possibly working relationships for Leo are:

Aries
Sagittarius
Gemini
Libra
Taurus
Scorpio
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I'm so proud of myself right now.
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